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Grief takes time, so give it all that it might need

It has been said “the measure of your grief is the measure of your love.”

Popular culture can lead us to believe that we should have “moved on” by now, “gotten over it” and “gotten on with life.”

But our grieving is part of our life, not something removed from it. And there is nothing wrong with allowing grief its time. Just as love takes time to grow, grief takes time to diminish.

Whether you are grieving for a loved one who has died, or some other great loss or setback, your sorrow needs to be given time to fully express itself.

The good news is that over time, grief will lose some of its ability to completely overwhelm us, even though it may still do so from time to time. In respecting our grief and allowing it to take its course, we also allow ourselves to begin to heal. There is light at the end of the tunnel.

While giving grief its due, remember that it does not have to become the defining quality of the rest of your life. Your loss always will be a part of you, but it does not have to be all of you. It is OK to live, learn and love again.

–         By Father Jim